Watching Spina take his leave with a seemingly permanent fixture of simmering fury, Bernkastel remained still and silent. Only after several moments passed did she relax. Her ears perked slightly at Whis's conversation but only turned her head to look at him directly when asked.
"You heard it more than once... no matter how you look at it, a lot of things are my fault. The trials with Doom, the Coin Hunter, your very reputations... even in company, I didn't cease being careless about everything around me."
For Bernkastel, to be cruel was a necessary evil in the world of witches. As long as she made her opponents surrender, she didn't care to be merciful in her methods. Whether she was hated or not by others, she established herself as a force to be respected. The pain she endured to become a witch never went away, never dulled unless she was the one inflicting the pain. Doing so was her only assurance she had escaped that hell. She was proud of being ruthless but coming from Cuki, it... stung. Cuki wasn't an enemy, but in minutes, what seemed so familiar was not; everything became jumbled up and wrong. Those hands that made warm meals, that bandaged Bern and even patted her head, were the same ones that broke Gogeta's arms and choked him before trying to strike her. And Bernkastel bit at those hands. When was it Cuki and when was it that ghostly man?
Did any of them really satisfy the criteria of a friendship if they stuck together out of habit?
"Gogeta's destructive tendencies are able to be corrected, but that wasn't what solely influenced my choice." She turned her head down. "He was trying to help the only way he knew how. And since he is quite forward with his thoughts and emotions, I could forgive it if he desired to be seen better." Bern gazed up at Whis with a forlorn look. "You don't have to believe me of course, it was between the two of us. Deep down, maybe I wanted a second chance with someone who wasn't burdened by the tragedy of the Trials."
Very vividly, she remembered calling them all friends for the first time... right before Vegetto trampled over that demanding Kassava's life as being worth more than the ones Voice resurrected as Coins. The word 'friends' was starting to feel like a curse word; maybe a sign that she didn't deserve such things either. She was right to feel wary about throwing it around.
"And... even though fighting Ultraman seemed like a farce, I wanted to prove to myself I was strong enough to have a future. If I couldn't beat someone whose strength eclipsed mine, then I was too weak to fight Hart. Gogeta had every chance to let Ultraman beat me to death before jumping in but he didn't-- regardless of his wish to fight Ultraman himself, he saved my life knowing my physical prowess is laughably weak. And did it again at the Valley. When he called me his friend," Bernkastel paused and turned to meet Gogeta's eyes for the first time since the commotion began. "I... liked how nice it felt. 'Happy'? Even if I'm not allowed to be called that, I liked it. Though... I'm sure you changed your mind now about us being 'the buddies' after all you heard."