I am going to vent now.
I give a lot. I help people - and if they come to me and are upset and need help - I will do what I can. But the person who asks needs to be able to help themselves, to let me help, and be appreciative - not backpedal, not make excuses for the situation they need help with, NOT drag me into a problem, and actually not want to change that situation.
It is a waste of my minimal time and energy and zaps me emotionally. Especially when it comes to animals, abuse, deliveries, grammar, and things that are obviously “not right.” I will NOT stand by and watch poor behavior. I will abide by wishes to an extent - and I definitely will take action once I get the “please help.”
That “please help” came today from someone I’ve helped for a while and the situation involves the parcel that was supposed to be delivered to his own address. It began days ago and I held back by request - I said I have no money due to the fact that I work every other week resulting in me not earning as much as I used to before the lockdowns. I unleashed today with that “please help.” Then the backpedaling began. Well, the unleashing has happened and the delivery rider decides to deliver the package meant for my uncle to the correct address. I have peace of mind that I finally was able to save some money. My point - do NOT use me to vent about serious issues, and then get upset when I help you, per request. These quotes sum up how I feel right now.
I have no remorse. I have done what is right. People act poorly and are deeply sick - and I will not stand by forever idle. Memo to the people who wish to feed off of me: Be thankful for help, because that help one day may be gone. Don’t abuse those who care. The days of me being taken advantage of are over.
---
Today I pondered.
It’s disheartening to me the people who’ve come into my life for a short time to use my kindness, stick around for a short time with contact and then vanish. Those who came around just for help with parcels, who need money, or need an ear to listen, then disappeared to carry on their lives and flock to the companionship of others.
It’s this behavior that makes me, and I’m sure others in these shoes, retract from being so quick to share or help.
I am very sensitive to being used and being ordered around. It’s happened severely because of my empathetic nature.
I do not forget or “not appreciate” what people do for me. I also do not seek help just to flee. I try to thank people and keep them in my circle and defend them. I do not forget them. I speak highly of them.
Those who have fled - if they approach me again - I will no longer be as quickly willing to help/give.
---
10-08-2022 update: Some people should not be working at the establishments such as public transport stations if they don't know how to be patient with PWDs.
