Vulcan Bride


Black Jacket
Sep 3, 2015
cyberia cafe
Hey all! I'm back with a short story one-shot. This is part of a 1000-word writing exercise, so don't expect a series out of this (I actually nearly reached 3,000 words!)
I took two prompts that were generated and mashed them into one: "Your character gets married" + "your character fights kaijus for a living". Hope you enjoy it all the same knowing I slightly spoiled it.

It was a momentous occasion-- the church was full of happy wedding attendees who took their seats and eagerly awaited for the ceremony to begin. The chatter began to die down once the organist began to play in tandem with the four-string quartet. As the song began, the priest stepped down the aisle and assumed his position at the front of the altar, followed by the family members of the groom, who stood at the altar awaiting his bride. The bridesmaids with groomsmen in tow stood in their rehearsed places, turning toward the pews of the Church with misty eyes. All the way at the last row stood the bride and her father at her side. 

The groom’s heart raced as he saw his bride for the first time that day. Although he always thought his fiance was beautiful, she truly looked to be the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her long hair hung over her shoulders with the ends in soft curls, with her wedding veil adorning her head like a halo of light as it caught the sun’s rays that shone through the mosaic glass. With her father at her side, the crowd held back tears of joy watching her step up to the altar.

The bride and groom exchanged anxious but excited glances while the priest welcomed the invited to the ceremony. After readings were read aloud and the couple shared their words of love for each other, the exchange of vows proceeded.

An exchange of “I dos” as a promise to remain together til death do they part, and maintain everlasting love in sickness and in health. The golden rings of oath were exchanged between the lovers as a symbol of their eternal communion and loyalty to one another, the bride’s veil lifted from her face with a gentle sweep of the groom’s hand. With joyous tears, the people listened for the long-anticipated words:

“Valentina and Joseph, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride!”

Leaning forward to close the space between them for their first kiss as newlyweds, the celebratory cheers and music were interrupted by a loud cacophony outside. With confusion and shock among the attendees, they looked around to see where the noises came from.

Suddenly, a loud roar pierced the air as the top of the church was blown off by a bright blast. An eruption of screams resulted as everyone clamored to run to the nearest safe spot, lest the remains of the church collapse on top of them. The bride looked around in the wake of the dust and shards of broken colored glass, noticing nobody was seriously hurt, but she couldn't find her newlywed husband anywhere in sight; she could only hear his cries for help as a large reptilian hand gripped him tightly and lifted him out of the Church before walking away in a series of shaking steps.

She grit her teeth and cursed as the crowd dispersed, loud thudding noises nearby echoing to indicate the blast came from something giant and bipedal.

“Seriously!? It had to be today of all days!? Absolutely ridiculous.” The bride turned towards those who remained cowering in their boots. “Quick! Go find the nearest evacuation zone, and I’ll take care of this.”
“Are you sure, Valentina!?”

“Today is supposed to be the day I’ve been the most sure about anything in my entire life. Joseph’s out there, and I think I’m the only one who can save him,” the bride said.

“...We’re leaving it to you then! Bring him back safe and sound. Be careful.” Her maid of honor looked back at her with teary eyes before escorting the remaining people out to safety. The last of the crowd scrambled their way out of what remained of the church.

Valentina, unconcerned for her own safety, turned on her heel and rushed back to her dressing room where she spent the past five hours getting ready, ripping off scraps of torn tulle from her dress as though it were mere tissue. She couldn’t be running around with four pounds of tulle on her needlessly, she was already forced to fight on heels. With full alert, she glanced around the room, looking for a wedding gift from her bridesmaids she originally received at the bachelorette party. They all pitched in to buy it, and it sat in the corner of the dressing room in a large rectangular box. Inside the delicately wrapped box sat a triple barreled rotary cannon, with a large golden ribbon strapped to the topmost barrel to boot-- she already had an idea that this would have been their gift to her though, seeing as all of them had to carry it in for her. The bride-to-be insisted that she open it the day of her wedding during the reception. Thankfully, it was in her best interest to try it out today.

Kicking off her wedding heels, Valentina strapped on the abandoned pair of combat boots she had worn in the morning before changing into her wedding attire-- not the most ideal footwear for a situation like this, but it wasn’t like she was going to fight kaijus in pencil thin heels that couldn’t support her weight in addition to a rotary cannon. Surprisingly, the cannon was about the same weight as the one-barrel rotary cannon she manned on her field missions, but perhaps this was due to slimming down each barrel’s overall size. In this time, a mere minute passed, but already, her work phone was blowing up with calls. 

“Valentina here,” she answered, quickly attaching a headset to her bridal veil’s headband.

“Jones! Congrats on your marriage, but sorry about the party crashers. We couldn’t hold them off long enough to push them back since we had to intercept the giant ones that are wreaking havoc up in East City. I know you have the day off, but--”

“Yeah, it’s not like I have any choice in the matter. They’ve got my husband held hostage.”

“I see. Well, you’ll be happy to hear that these ones are small fries compared to the usual kaiju we see on the coast. We’ll be sending in a few choppers to help you. Hope you didn’t leave your heavy artillery at home!” 

As she made her way back to the front of the church and face the reptilian kaiju rampaging through the city, she could hear the distant drone of helicopters flying low. She could hear rounds being fired off and the roar of a monster under attack.

“Never leave unprepared, they say. I’ll report back soon, Conrad. Over.” Ending the transmission, Valentina strapped her work phone to the garterbelt on her leg after tearing away a few more strips of tulle to lighten her steps. “Sheesh, I wish I had my usual equipment… way easier to work with than this setup. Oh well.” Spotting a dinosaur-like kaiju nearby attempt to swat away an attack helicopter, she took aim with her vulcan after loading the artillery belt into it. Aiming for its head, she fired off a huge volley of bullets that lobbed into the back of its skull, downing it completely after a few seconds of fire. Smoke billowed from the freshly spun barrels while discarded artillery shells littered the concrete. If she held the trigger longer than a mere 4 seconds, it would have eaten through the entire belt.

Valentina, satisfied with her work, charged through the rest of the city looking for any kaiju that had a hand occupied. Some choppers were distracting a handful of them, but a few remained on the run and continued their destruction of mouth-blasts. They seemed no larger than a 4 story building, so she wasn’t required to board a helicopter to fill them full of bullets. With no time wasted, the bride left a trail of empty shells behind her as she proceeded through the city unloading rounds into the kaiju that were foolish enough to engage with her. Finally, she came across the same kaiju that had kidnapped her husband. It was the largest, about 2 stories taller than the other ones she had encountered. 

That meant this one was the ringleader. It looked like it was going to devour her husband for a snack, but seemed to be angrily looking for a building to use as either a dining table or a buffet-- but the alarms were blaring this entire time, so she was certain West City was mostly evacuated by now. This must have frustrated the kaiju boss since it was angrily blasting whatever building it saw to be empty and snack-less. 

She charged towards it with her vulcan aimed at the back, reloading it with a fresh belt of bullets. “Hey ugly! Over here!” She shouted. The volley of bullets she unleashed got its attention, and the giant reptile glowered at her with her husband in hand. It opens its mouth to let out an ear-piercing roar before spewing a blast of blue fire at her. 

“Whoa!” She ducked behind an abandoned delivery truck, narrowly missing the wall of fire. That was a new trick-- she thought it could only make vaporizing lasers, and with no aerial support, she was on her own with this one at the moment. “Alright. You want to make this difficult? We’ll make it difficult.”

With a scowl on her face she charged towards the kaiju again, but instead of firing another blast, it turned around in order to swing its tail. Unprepared for such a sudden attack, she was nearly flung into a nearby brick building; her attempts to slow down her momentum failed by digging her heels into the ground, so she attempted using the cannon. Its abrasion across the concrete left behind a trail of sparks, but she still ended up hitting a building’s side rather hard, causing her to hack up blood from the shock of the blow. Gasping for breath from having the wind knocked out of her, she saw the reptile huff in a mocking manner.

Don’t even try, stupid meatbag, she imagined it saying. Enraged, she sucked air back into her lungs and fought the burning sensation in her exhausted muscles, taking action once again. Eyes locked on the reptilian tail that lay splayed over the concrete idly, she hoisted her vulcan off the ground and made a break for it, aiming to make her way to the kaiju’s weak points by climbing along its tail. The rough scales running along the tail made for excellent stepping stones as she forced her momentum to propel herself upwards along its back. Any hesitation or sudden stops would risk her falling from the monster’s back, certainly able to kill her from the height she was ascending. 

The kaiju could feel her weight on its back, a mere tickling sensation, but still there. It slowly craned its neck to look behind itself and spotted her by the glint of her vulcan. It heard the rapid motions of the rotary cannon go off, then an onslaught of bullets.

Its vision for that eye went black-- and a blossoming pain followed it. The monster opened its toothy maw and let out a mighty roar, thrashing its body around wildly to force her off, even destroying a nearby building with it. Valentina lost her sturdy footing, but refused to let go of her vulcan and hold onto one of the spinal scales. Next thing she knew, she could only see the sky surrounded with shards of debris surrounding her, with the kaiju looming over her.

“Valentina! No!!Joseph witnessed this all, and cried out, reaching out for his newlywed wife with his only free arm thanks to its iron grip on his body. The kaiju turned even further, allowing him to see her falling down. His eyes widened watching it open its maw again, bending down to snatch her up in its toothy abyss of a mouth-- he saw this and let out a scream that was drowned out by the sound of destruction all around him. The noises of collapsing buildings could not allow his voice to be carried out that far.

The beast’s maw closed in on her, seemingly swallowing her whole. And there was nothing he could have done other than watch.

No!! No, no, no, no, no, NO! Why!? Why couldn't it have been me!?” Joseph repeatedly slammed his fist against the fingers wrapping around him, futile as it was. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he fought against the wave of despair washing over him, with the kaiju slowly turning to look at him. It would give him no time to mourn her.

Is this the end for me too? I didn't even get to say goodbye, or even enjoy one day as a married couple… Anticipating the inevitable, he turned away and shut his eyes tightly as the fear overtook him. Til death do us part, was how the vow went, but he wasn't even prepared to face that.

But the end did not come, after moments of waiting, and nothing happened.

With his heart pounding against his chest, he fearfully opened an eye to peek out at the monster. "H-huh? I'm still alive?"

It hadn’t moved an inch since he last saw it; but he felt it suddenly tense up, tightening its grip on him as well. Almost choking on nothing, he watched the kaiju move with a sudden lack of aggression in its movement. He couldn't hear the dull humming that was brewing in its mouth. Unexpectedly, he saw its blood spurt out from the back of its skull-- comically, its blood was a dark blue, and more flowed out from its mouth upon opening it. Slowly, he felt his center of gravity shift as the kaiju slumped over, and ultimately began its fall. It's dying? But how?

Looking up, he saw something fall from its bloody maw out of his peripheral vision-- 

She was awake, and alive, with a tearful smile on her face as she fell in headfirst towards him, her smoking cannon at her side with remnants of the kaiju’s blood on it. However, no matter what, she seemed to not get any closer to him, and then he realized he was suddenly weightless-- the kaiju had let go of him and he was free-falling towards the concrete. 

“I’ve got you!” The bride thrust her vulcan forward with one arm and stuck out her free arm towards him as she shifted her center of weight onto the heavy artillery, leading her to fall at a faster velocity than he was. He felt her snatch him by the jacket of his tuxedo, hugging him close. 

“Sorry about the dress. I kind of ruined it!” She shouted over the howling winds as they made their way down to Earth-- a loud ‘boom’ sounded out once the kaiju’s body made contact with the ground. 

“It doesn’t matter! You’re safe and you helped save the city!” Joseph laughed with a face full of tears, hugging onto his hero as they descended. With a heavy thud, they landed directly on the kaiju’s back, square between its shoulders.

“I guess I did.” Valentina leaned against her groom, her muscles finally having given out. “Just in the nick of time too-- I ran out of bullets in the end. Let’s… go home...” Exhausted, she gave her husband a weary smile and held hands with him, making their way home.

“What about everyone else?”

“Pretty sure they evacuated to the safe zone. I’ve got a few missed calls from Conrad, since I got busy. We’ll pick them up…” She said as the sound of a helicopter began to fly lower and lower, nearing their location as the other choppers began their protocol before issuing an all-clear.

The next day…

“It was a remarkable sight! West City was filled with rampaging kaiju and devastated a grand majority of the infrastructure. It will be several weeks before the city is back to 100% power. But it was taken care of in the span of a few hours, with the help of a mysterious young lady and her vulcan! Our news station managed to capture footage of her showdown with several kaiju, including the largest one that appeared to lead them in on the attack!” The news anchor reported, replaying aerial footage recorded from the day before among the chaos of the battle choppers. Most of the shots were a few lucky candids of Valentina filling the reptilian monsters full of lead, but the most clear one was between her and the leader of the kaiju.

“Looks like you’re a celebrity, huh?” Her coworker, Conrad, sat down next to her as they watched the TV in the break room.

“I guess so… my feet are killing me! Can you believe they didn’t even give me the day off to rest my back?!” Valentina complained, adjusting some of her bandages while cleaning off her newlywed’s gift since she was too tired to do it the previous night.

“If your bones ain’t broke, there’s no fixin’ needed. That’s how it goes around here.”

“As of now, this woman is unidentified, but she is West City’s hero for having saved the town from a complete devastation! A Bride who came to save her Groom in distress-- a romantic sight indeed, amidst the unfortunate circumstances. Some have argued the entire thing was an  elaborately-orchestrated event for an upcoming film! But until we find the truth, we dub this mysterious vigilante as Vulcan Bride! You have West City's utmost gratitude. And congratulations on your marriage!" 

The news footage shifted to show her and her husband sitting on the kaiju, awaiting the helicopter to pick them up and transfer them over to the safe zone.

"Back to you, Andrew..."

“Do I count as a vigilante if I do this kinda thing for a living?” She looked at Conrad quizzically as the news anchor changed to a different subject.

“Eh. You know how it is with news stations. A little embellishment here and there never hurt the ratings. To be fair, it’s not like you were in your usual gear that we wear when we patrol the Coast. Maybe they’ll make a movie about you?” Conrad joked.

“Very funny. Well, at least they have us on inventory duty for today. I don’t have the energy to chase around monsters all day today… can’t wait for that honeymoon so I can get a break.”

“Be sure to take your baby with you.” Conrad jerked his thumb to her vulcan before laughing aloud at his terrible joke. “Ha ha ha-- OUCH!”

The End

Basically, with this approach, I took a bit of artistic liberty with it and didn't really go along with realism for this one. I kind of messed with the laws of physics/gravity but in the end I wanted to achieve a comical fantasy type of thing. I'll probably update this thread with cover art of some sort eventually.

Hope you enjoyed reading!
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